I dun want to be emo but i can't control and i can't help it ....is this one of those mean cycle that i have to go through ? i wish i have mood to draw or doodle but i dun have mood for drawing nor doodle ....i wish i can find that feeling again when everything is right , this is not the time to leave i knew it ...not until next year i will change a job ...okay maybe i jsut target the job like Art teacher ...children art teacher ....i think kid isn't that bad , maybe someone refer them as " devil " XDD LOL yup...some of them can be " angel" too .... is it the weather that make me so emo , i guess so ....but maybe it 's because of someone 's else thought ....i think knowing what ppl is thinking is not a good idea , mind reader ...a bad idea to me .
Recently the sky was kind of grey and i dun feel like smiling ....only if i hear some joke or something really funny. i guess one of the reason is someone just " walk in" and say hello and that person is the one that i try to get over it for like a few year ....and then we chat and then he's gone ......like disappear even though i know he 's hidding and i dun feel like contact him , we dun have thing to talk or something to start a conversation .....*sigh* i dun want to be emo honestly what should i be ? but i try to be happy , okay ?
SO what if i still single ....i dun have to be taken , rite ? ( i think i 'm having a fight with myself all the time , struggle against something and then compromise..it's so sick ! ) My alter ego ....fighting with me ...NO ..i want to be happy ....
During college , my friend planning to have a business but it just a idea ....*sigh* i wish i can have my own business...not just planning but want to have it ...
hmmm.....i feel like i going back to that self again .....tomorrow either read book or tried to doodle , draw and brainstorming something for my oil painting
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